How Men Face the Fat Problem It is a pleasure to see men of a certain age worrying about their weight. Listening to them is not such a pleasure. Because the men are new at the game, they don't hesitate to discuss the fat problem incessantly. However, women of the same age do not discuss the fat problem, especially not in mixed company. They prefer to face the problem with quiet dignity. Discussing the problem might only draw attention to some stray body part that may be successfully tucked away under an article of clothing. The age at which a man begins to explore the fat problem can vary. The actual problem can manifest itself in the early 30's, but broad-range discussion usually starts later. There are early nonverbal symptoms. I've watched the rugged journalist who shares my apartment sneak by with a Diet Coke. His shirts are no longer neatly tucked in to display a trim waist. Recently he has begun to verbalize his anxiety. He tells me, with a sheepish grin, that he is taking his suits to Chinatown to have them 'tailored. ' Still-older men have lost their dignity and rattle on unabashedly. Often, wives and children play important roles in their fat-inspection rituals. Take my oldest brother, a former college football player. His daughter says that several times a day he will stand at attention and call out, 'Fat, medium or thin?' She knows the correct answer: medium. Thin would be an obvious stretch, and fat may not get her that new video. According to his wife, he stands in front of the mirror in the morning (before the day's meals take their toll), puts his hands behind his head and lurches into a side bend, then clutches the roll that has developed and says, 'Am I getting fatter. His wife is expected to answer, 'You look like you may have lost a few pounds. ' And then there are the ex-husbands, a pitiful group. They are extremely vocal. When I go to the movies with one, he confides that he is suffering from great hunger because he is dieting. He hasn't eaten since the pancakes and sausages he wolfed down that morning. He pauses in his monologue while he buys his popcorn. After the movie, we sprint to a restaurant, where he again pauses to devour a basket of bread. Before he orders his chaste salad and soup, he grows plaintive. Do I think he's fat? Men of a certain age are always ready to talk about their fat problem.