Reading 1 What Should We Do for Our Friends? Roger Baumgarte 1 Take a minute and think about one of your closest friends, someone you care deeply about, someone you see as important in your life. 2 Now that you have this person firmly in mind, I want you to imagine you are together and your friend happens to be driving. You are in the passenger seat.And as much as you love this person, you have to admit your friend is driving rather recklessly and too fast. Then the unthinkable happens: your friend hits a pedestrian. 3 The pedestrian is seriously injured and taken to hospital. Your friend is put on trial and you are called to testify. In fact, you are the only witness to the event. The outcome of the trial will depend on your evidence. If you testify your friend was speeding, he or she will go to prison. If you testify your friend was not speeding, he or she will very likely go free. It’s all up to you. What would you do? 4 Before reading on, please decide — will you testify your friend was speeding,or will you testify your friend was not speeding? 5 Trompenaars put this scenario to thousands of people in a wide variety of cultures. He found that people differ dramatically in what they see as the appropriate thing for a good friend to do. In the U.S., 93% of respondents said they would testify against their close friend, stating he or she was indeed speeding. By comparison, in South Korea, only 37% said they would testify their close friend was speeding. 6 The typical American would feel truly bad testifying against a close friend. Yet,he or she feels no strong obligation to bend the truth just to save a friend from serving jail time, especially since the friend was clearly in the wrong.Americans tend to see it as a matter of legalities, applying the rule of law fairly to all concerned, regardless of personal relationships. Telling the truth is the only fair thing to do in this case. 7 South Koreans assess the situation quite differently. In their culture, friends feel a strong obligation to protect one another, which leads them to consider that the fair and appropriate thing to do in this case is to stand up for the friend. After all, if you can’t count on your friends to stand by you in times of need, whom can you trust? Fairness means being true to one’s friends. 8 The Korean style of friendship came out quite clearly in another study comparing the friendship styles of university students in five different cultures.Students in France, Spain, the U.S., Cuba and China were asked to read the following sketch in their own language: 9 Megan and Cherylatt end the same university and are the best of friends. While they often have fun together and care a lot about each other, school work is one area where they differ. Megan is less interested in school and is only an average student,while Cheryl does well in nearly every course she takes. Cheryl tries to influence Megan to be a better student so she will be successful in life.Sometimes, Cheryl reads over Megan’s class notes, making corrections and adding specific information for her to study. Cheryl often insists Megan study when she doesn’t really feel like it. Cheryl thinks Megan is too interested in having fun and not sufficiently serious about her work. They are best friends but they clearly have different ideas about school. 10 They were then asked to rate this friendship. Students in France and the U.S. tended to see it as an unhealthy relationship. They saw Cheryl as too controlling —many thought she needed to mind her own business and not try to change Megan to be someone she is not. Cheryl, they argued, must learn to accept Megan the way she is. Students in China, Spain and Cuba were more likely to see it as a warm,healthy and caring relationship. Cheryl genuinely cared about Megan and was doing all she could to help her out. The students in these cultures were accustomed to the idea that good friends naturally take care of each other,intervening in each other’s lives, helping them to become better people. To them, these are normal friend behaviors. It is what good friends do. 1 The author begins his essay by telling a true stoy.